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Find the words or the year.

Find wording, traditions and practical ideas for the occasion you are marking.

A wooden index-card drawer standing open with blank cream cards, one pulled halfway up.
  1. The milestones

    15th anniversary gifts: crystal, and what that word means

    Fifteen years is crystal - a word with four legal categories behind it, where a piece sold as crystal need not be lead crystal, and where the classic gift comes with a storage caveat nobody mentions.

  2. The milestones

    20th anniversary: china

    Twenty years is china. Other materials on this list are regulated on what they may be called; china is regulated on what it may release - and a plate and a cup are not measured the same way.

  3. The milestones

    35th wedding anniversary gifts: coral, and what to ask first

    Thirty-five years is coral - a living animal, partly protected under CITES and partly not, depending on the species. What is listed, what is not, and the version of the tradition that asks nothing of a reef.

  4. The first years

    3rd anniversary gifts: leather, and what the label is not telling you

    Three years is leather. Cloth has rules about what it may be called, and so do shoes - but a leather wallet is neither, and we could not find an instrument that covers it.

  5. The first years

    4th anniversary gifts: flowers, fruit - or linen?

    The fourth is the year the lists fall out. Debrett's gives flowers and fruit; some gift lists say linen. Here is which is which, and what to give once you know.

  6. The milestones

    AI couple portraits, explained.

    A portrait of the two of you, from a photograph you already have. Exactly how it is made, what you see before you pay, and when you should commission a human painter instead.

  7. The first years

    Anniversary gifts by year.

    The traditional UK anniversary gift list dates to the late nineteenth century and assigns a material (paper, cotton, leather, wood) to each year of marriage. The full list, what each material symbolises, and a …

  8. The first years

    Cotton anniversary gifts (2nd).

    The traditional second-anniversary material is cotton, separate threads woven into one cloth. What to give, why cotton is the tradition, and the keepsake ideas that fit year two.

  9. Getting engaged

    Getting engaged

    Who buys what, what it costs, and what to write in the card, before a date is even set.

  10. The milestones

    Golden (50th) wedding anniversary gifts.

    Golden (50th) wedding anniversary gifts mark the headline milestone: fifty years married. The material is gold, the gifts run bigger, and the right one earns a place on a wall. Here's what to give, how much to …

  11. The wedding

    How much should you spend on a wedding gift?

    How much you spend on a wedding gift has no set figure: it depends on how close you are to the couple and what you can comfortably afford, not a rule anyone should feel bound by.

  12. The wedding

    How to write wedding vows.

    The structure that works in almost any ceremony, why it works, what most couples get wrong, and how to keep the words safely after the day.

  13. The first years

    Paper anniversary gifts (1st).

    The traditional first-anniversary material is paper. Light, modest, made to last only if you choose carefully. What to give, why paper is the tradition, and where to shop in the UK.

  14. The milestones

    Pearl (30th) wedding anniversary gifts.

    The 30th wedding anniversary is the pearl anniversary in the UK, diamond on the modern list. Here's what the milestone means, how much to spend, and the gift ideas that suit thirty years together.

  15. The milestones

    Silver (25th) wedding anniversary gifts.

    Twenty-five years married is the silver wedding anniversary, the first of the big milestones and halfway to a golden. Here's what silver means, how much to spend, and the 25th anniversary gift ideas worth the o…

  16. The first years

    The first years

    Paper, cotton, leather, wood. Where the year-by-year list comes from and what it asks of you.

  17. The milestones

    The milestones

    Tin, silver, pearl, ruby, gold. The years that get a party, and what earns a place on the wall.

  18. The milestones

    The ruby anniversary.

    The 40th wedding anniversary is the ruby anniversary: deep red, hard-wearing, and rare enough to mean something. Here's what the ruby tradition is, how much to spend, and the 40th anniversary gift ideas worth k…

  19. The milestones

    The tin anniversary.

    The 10 year wedding anniversary is the tin anniversary, diamond on the modern list. It's the first double-digit milestone, the first one people throw a party for. Here's what it means, and what to give.

  20. The wedding

    The wedding

    The etiquette, the spend, and the words: what a guest is expected to do.

  21. The first years

    UK wedding anniversary list

    Year one is paper and year fifty is gold. This guide follows Debrett’s British list, explains where the competing “modern” list differs, and covers the years with rules that affect your choice.

  22. More guides and references

    Wedding & anniversary guides.

    Find words for the card, understand an anniversary tradition or choose a gift that fits the couple. Start with the occasion.

  23. More guides and references

    Wedding and anniversary questions, answered.

    Short, direct answers to the wedding and anniversary questions people ask: card wording, gift etiquette, and the anniversary symbols by year.

  24. The first years

    What are the traditional wedding anniversary symbols?

    The UK traditional list pairs a material with each anniversary year (paper, wood, tin, silver, gold and more) building from fragile to enduring as the years pass.

  25. The wedding

    What do you write in a wedding card?

    What you write in a wedding card should be short, warm and sincere: congratulate the couple, add one thing that's about them, and stop there.

  26. The first years

    What do you write in an anniversary card?

    What you write in an anniversary card should be warm and personal: reference the years together, then say one true thing about the marriage rather than a generic line.

  27. Getting engaged

    What do you write in an engagement card?

    What you write in an engagement card should congratulate them warmly on the engagement itself, then say you're looking forward to the wedding: short and genuine beats elaborate.

  28. The milestones

    What is the 65th wedding anniversary?

    Sixty-five years qualifies for a message from the King. It is also the anniversary where the British list gives no material at all - which is not what the rest of the internet will tell you.

  29. The milestones

    What is the diamond wedding anniversary?

    The diamond wedding anniversary is the 60th year of marriage, and the first that qualifies for a message from the King. Here is the rule as GOV.UK states it, the application deadlines, and the fact that it cost…

  30. The milestones

    What is the golden wedding anniversary?

    The golden wedding anniversary is the 50th year of marriage, and its material is gold.